A Letter to J

J,

I’m in Boston. I bet your universe functions well; so does mine.

I spent most of my time on the plane sleeping and, reading Haruki Murakami ‘s “After Dark” and a little “Dance Dance Dance”; you know what I intend. I thought about you.

I can’t live in your fiction because I am not supposed to be there. It ‘s not that we are parallel; that is , although we are basically two lines with no intersection, we can still be assumed to intersect at plenty aspects, if we both agree with the general consensus of “space.”

You know what I intend; precisely, you understand me. While I do not. I read Haruki Murakami because I discern a surreal atmosphere, just like the one you wrap your words with. Lyoko* said, “I will not be surprised if you disappear.” I felt the same on Eri in After Dark.

Eri was sleeping, blocked, dimming. In my universe you were just like sleeping; I saw merely your reflection, an unwittingly chosen one.
Mari was told to trust in a connection with her sister. “After all, you are sisters. There must be a time when you two were dependent.” Mari cuddled Eri close (If Eri turned out to be intangible I believe Mari would do the same), while I cannot. I cannot cuddle you and gain a faith in the connection.

“Go to the Dolphin Hotel. To see the Sheep Man. Then there are connections.”
“After reading ‘Dance Dance Dance’ you’ll understand,” the Sheep Man will say, “maybe even after ‘A Wild Sheep Chase’.”

“You don’t make promise, do you?”
“Dance!”
“Dance! When you feel alone.”

J, It is still possible that we intersect.
I’ll find the Sheep Man.

A

J,

我現在在Boston。相信妳的宇宙運作的很好:我的也是。

在飛機上的大部份時間我都在睡覺和,讀村上春樹的「黑夜之後」和一點點「舞舞舞」;妳知道我的意思。我想到了妳。

之所以不能夠存在於妳的故事裡是因為我不應該如此。那不是我們互相平行:那是,即便我們基本上是兩條沒有交集的線,從很多角度看來我們依舊可以被認為是相交的,如果我們雙方都認同「空間」這個一般性的共同意見。

妳知道我的意思;準確的說,妳懂我。但我不懂。我讀村上春樹是因為我察覺到了一股超現實的氣氛,正是妳用來包裹妳的文字的那種東西。容子說:「就算妳從世界上消失我也不會感到意外喔。」我對於淺井惠麗有相同的感覺。

淺井惠麗沈睡著,被隔離著,消逝著。在我的宇宙中妳也沈睡著;我只見到妳的倒影,一個在無意識之下被選擇的一個倒影。

有人叫淺井瑪麗相信聯繫的存在。「畢竟妳們是姊妹嘛。一定有一個時刻妳們是緊緊相依的。」瑪麗緊擁著惠麗(如果惠麗最終化為非實體我相信瑪麗也會坐同樣的事情吧!),但我不能。我不能擁抱著妳,然後得到一份對聯繫的信仰。

「去海豚飯店吧。去見見羊男。那裡有聯繫。」
「讀完『舞舞舞』妳會了解的,」羊男將會說 「也許還要讀完『尋羊冒險記』。」

「你不保證吧?是嗎?」
「跳舞呀!」
「跳舞呀!當妳感到孤單的時候。」

J,我們還是有可能交會的。
我會找到羊男。

A

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